


Dark Star

by charlie_c



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: (for now... I'll be honest I have no idea where I'll take this), F/F, Fluff, Garrus is the galaxy's most patient wingman, Mass Effect 1, Shepard is a little shit and Liara learns not to put up with it, Slow Burn, also they do some sick mako stunts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2017-04-29
Packaged: 2018-10-25 08:25:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10760442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charlie_c/pseuds/charlie_c
Summary: Liara grapples with some complicated feelings and an even more complicated new CO, as she struggles to find her voice and her place aboard the Normandy.





	Dark Star

**Author's Note:**

> This absolutely started out intended as a one-shot but then it just... kept going... sooo I'll update with new chapters when I can?? I guess??

Liara had certainly heard the name “Shepard” long before she set foot on the Normandy. Alliance operations didn't tend to impact archaeological digs in any notable capacity, but when one Commander Shepard cemented her place in history as the first human Spectre, her military background and current exploits inevitably became a favorite topic of conversation among just about anyone paying attention. What Liara had gleaned was that Shepard was a force to be reckoned with, and that whether she was a force for good or ill largely depended on who you were talking to at any given time. Still, Liara was willing to concede that anyone ready to navigate a contingent of geth and face down a krogan bounty hunter to get her out of a collapsing dig site had earned her respect--even if she did occasionally remind herself that it was most likely her knowledge of the Protheans that was actually getting rescued.

Ultimately she had resolved to make her own observations, draw her own conclusions, and what she had most immediately concluded was this: Shepard was a soldier before she was anything else, focused, determined, and tactical to a fault; she acted with unshakable confidence in all things, for better or worse; she was deeply invested in her crew, and as personable with them as she could safely be; she was very human and as such mildly baffling, but she was, in her way, somehow larger than life.

Liara had entirely missed the narcissistic streak until it was too late.

In retrospect, it would have been a stupid comment to anyone, in any context. But she had gotten caught up in the moment, had stopped editing herself. “That's why I find you so fascinating, Shepard,” she had said, and almost immediately regretted it when she registered the shift in the commander's expression. It was subtle, indecipherable in the moment, and Liara’s automatic fear was that she had crossed a line and managed to offend the commander.

Shepard braced her hip against the narrow table, crossing her arms and quirking an eyebrow. “You think I'm  _fascinating?_ ” she repeated the comment, turned the word over like she was appraising it, and Liara instantly lost her mental grip on whatever she might have intended to say next. “Would that be professionally, or... _personally?"_

“Oh, I- apologies Commander, I did not mean to-” Liara felt her cheeks flush as she fumbled with a response, but Shepard cut her off with a light chuckle and a dismissive wave before she could get out a coherent sentence.

“Well hey, listen,” the commander said, leaning forward and dropping her voice to a near-whisper, like she was sharing something confidential, “stick around, doctor, I'm just getting started.” She winked, and without another word excused herself from the med bay.

 

Liara thought about that conversation a lot in the weeks that followed, trying to untangle her own feelings after the fact. She learned to watch for that particular expression, convinced that if she could pin a meaning to it, she would be able to make sense of their interaction. It didn't take her long to pick out the pattern. Whenever they were on the Citadel and someone recognized Shepard from the news vids, or whenever she had the opportunity to throw her Spectre status at a problem, or the one time she had, against all odds, managed to threaten and intimidate her way through a hostage negotiation on reputation alone, without ever firing a shot--this was when Liara caught the slight shift in her posture, the lift of her chin and the almost imperceptible smirk. It was a look that said she _knew_ she was larger than life, but that she hadn't thought about it in a while and she appreciated the reminder.

Liara hated it.

Maybe it was childish. Maybe she was showing her age, but once she realized what the look _was_ , she resented having been so wholly and easily disarmed by it, and all she really wanted to do was find a way to turn it around and throw it back in the commander’s face. It didn’t seem so out of the question--for all of Shepard’s swagger and confidence, no one else on the Normandy seemed especially cowed by her. The human crew members always seemed willing enough to speak their minds, voice their disagreements, at least until it came down to the letter of Alliance regulation. Garrus traded snark with Shepard like they'd been drinking buddies for years (or so Liara imagined, not that she'd ever had one), and the krogan was downright antagonistic, but even he stayed. Even so, Liara had little experience with military hierarchy and even less experience with _humans_ . There was no telling what could be considered acceptable dissent and what might get her unceremoniously thrown off the ship. Besides, they _had_ saved her life and were continuing to shield her from another attack. It seemed foolish to compromise that, and so she felt she owed Shepard at least a modicum of patience.

Still, what they settled into was no more than an uneasy rapport, though it was impossible for Liara to tell who was really holding who at arm’s length. Shepard went out of her way to check in now and then, and when she asked Liara about herself, her research, her people, there was a disarming honesty to her interest. Yet she spent just as much time and energy needling Liara about her less than stellar social skills and her inexperience with human customs, always ready to linger on a foolish question or a poorly considered comment, always with that wicked glint in her eye that said she thought it was hilarious. For her part, Liara could never quite shake her own fascination with the commander--and was equally eager to ply her for information on her history and exposure to the prothean beacon whenever they spoke--but she also couldn't quite shake the suspicion that Shepard's attention stemmed from nothing but a desire to feed her own ego.

**

“I fear I may have made a serious mistake,” Liara admitted, listlessly rotating her mug on the surface of the mess hall table. “Perhaps I have... given her the wrong impression of my character…”

Garrus hummed thoughtfully, leaning back against the partition wall. “Well… Let me ask you this,” he said at length. “Exactly what impression did you _want_ her to get?”

Liara frowned at the empty cup between her hands, turning the question over in her mind. “I… am unsure,” she began hesitantly. Then, with slightly more confidence, she added, “but I am a _scientist_ , she treats me as if I am a pet or some particularly precocious child.”

Garrus chuckled to himself, earning a scowl from Liara that she suspected came across as more of a pout. “You're trying too hard,” he said, and when her brow furrowed in confusion he elaborated, “you're too worried about overstaying your welcome… I know Williams and some of the others might have you think you're here on borrowed time, but the fact is…” he hesitated, leaning to the side to peer toward the elevator, before lowering his voice, “I think Shepard is in over her head, and we _need_ any kind of experts we can get. That means you. We can't afford to turn you out just because you have an opinion someone doesn't like. You're a part of this team, you can act like it.”

Liara sighed. “I am not sure I know _how_ to-” she started, before Shepard's voice interrupted her over their comms.

_“Attention Normandy--we're on our way into the Armstrong Nebula. Hackett has eyes on a geth presence and apparently we’re on clean-up. Vakarian, you're with me. T’Soni, I want you on the ground too.”_

Liara blinked, exchanging a momentary glance with Garrus. She raised on hand to touch the comm unit on her uniform, and tentatively asked, “ah, may I ask why, Commander..?”

“ _Preliminary survey says we're looking at Prothean ruins in the closest system. I'd rather have you combing them over than me."_ Garrus tilted his head slightly, giving her a pointed look as if to say _see?_ After a beat Shepard added, _“not about to get chewed out by the Council for blowing up another dig site, y’know?”_ and her comm picked up a moment of someone else’s laughter before cutting out.

Garrus hesitated, mandibles flexing pensively. “Well,” he offered, “it’s a start, I guess.”

  


They braced against the impact as the mako touched down heavily on Antibaar and skidded to an ungraceful stop, icy gravel crunching under its tires. “I’ll _never_ get used to that landing,” Garrus grumbled as he shifted in the front passenger seat, and Shepard responded with nothing but an indulgent laugh. She flicked on the display for the external camera, and a panorama of jagged frost-covered rocks flickered to life before them, dual suns glowing dully through the thick cloud cover. For a barren, rocky planet it was unexpectedly scenic, Liara thought, though she felt a chill across her skin just watching the snow swirling in the high winds beyond the safety of their hull. 

“Alright,” Shepard said, kicking the mako into gear and angling its nose east of their initial landing site. “Nav point says we've got a dig riiiight… this way.” Only minutes later, as they crested an outcropping of rock and rolled into another clearing, the commander gave a muttered _"shit"_ under her breath and leaned forward, squinting at the front display. The mako shuddered to a stop as she pressed one of the myriad buttons on the console, zooming the display in on the ground a few hundred meters ahead of them. From her position in the back Liara had to lean forward, grasping the sides of the seats in front of her to get a decent view of the scene. Another vehicle sat, burned out and half-buried in snow, with several smaller forms scattered around it. “Huh,” Shepard breathed, in the same moment that Liara fully processed what she was seeing.

“Oh, goddess,” she gasped. There must have been at least a dozen bodies, some indistinguishable from weapon and fire damage, but some very clearly geth.

“Judging by the snow cover, the geth must have wiped out the researchers before we even landed,” Garrus said.

“Yeah, but then…” Shepard began, her thought trailing off unfinished.

“Then who killed the geth,” Liara supplied. Shepard glanced back for just a moment, her expression difficult to read, before turning her attention back to the controls.

“Well let's find out what they were fighting over,” she said, returning the display to its wider view as the mako lurched forward again. They banked wide around the wreckage, until at the far side of the clearing a dark shape began to resolve out of the whirling snow--a wide circular platform, several pillars lining its edge with one smooth obelisk standing much higher than its peers.

It was a modest site, at least judging by what was visible on the surface, but Liara recognized the architecture easily. “That must be the ruin. It seems to be abandoned now, do you think the geth found what they want- _wait!_ ” They were advancing at an alarming speed, and Liara suddenly feared they would crash directly into the nearest pillar. At the last second Shepard angled the mako sharply and hit the brakes, sending her passengers pitching sideways and casting a spray of loose snow over the ruins as the vehicle came to a sharp stop only feet away from the edge of the platform. The commander grinned, looking expectantly between her teammates, but Liara could do nothing more than catch her breath as she glanced at the front display, praying they hadn't kicked up any debris that might damage the ruins.

“Very impressive,” Garrus said dryly, righting himself a second time.

Shepard’s grin faded and she scoffed. “I’d like to see either of you do better.” She twisted in her seat, reaching past Liara to the footlocker where their helmets had been secured--and spared from the tumultuous ride--but her reach fell short. Liara leaned over instead, disengaging the lock and passing Shepard’s and Garrus’ helmets forward before claiming her own. “You're a pip, T’Soni,” Shepard said, straightening and slipping the shielded helmet into place. Whatever bemused response Liara might have offered died in the sudden flurry of cold wind that filled the compartment the instant Shepard raised the mako’s hatch. The commander dropped to the ground and drew her pistol in one swift movement, giving the ruins a quick sweep as Garrus and Liara followed her out. Garrus ranged farther into the clearing, rifle in hand as he moved toward the wreckage they had passed. Liara hesitated, willing herself to ignore the biting cold that seemed to seep in even past her shields and through the thick material of her armor. Flexing her fingers experimentally, she stalked away from the mako and toward the ruins. Though it was only a small comfort, the pillars and the high natural wall of rock the ruins were nestled against broke up the wind just enough to make the space tolerable, at least for a short time.

A short burst of static preceded Shepard’s voice over the comm in Liara’s helmet. _"You have any idea what the geth were after here? Or the researchers, for that matter?_ ” She had posted up at the edge of the prothean platform, watching Garrus as he knelt to examine the corpses.

Liara walked the length of the platform, examining a few of the pillars as she went. There were no obvious devices or mechanisms to interact with, but when she arrived at the base of the obelisk, she found a crate that had been hastily tucked up against the rock face and hidden under packed down snow. She dug the crate out and pulled it away from the wall, prying it open as Shepard wandered over to her side. Most of the contents were inconsequential--a bundle of rags, a variety of instruments for surveying the ruins themselves--but amidst the miscellany she found a single OSD. She held it up triumphantly, saying _“this_ may have our-” before she was interrupted by a sudden vibration through the ground.

She glanced up at Shepard, who had grown visibly tense within an instant. The commander took a few steps away, saying _“Vakarian, get back here."_  Liara rose to her feet, wondering if Antibaar was prone to quakes, when she felt a second, even stronger tremor, then several things happened very quickly. Shepard swore violently and Liara felt an arm fall heavily against her back as she was shoved back down toward the ground. The pressure stayed across her shoulders as she threw her arms over her head, even with no knowledge of what she was trying to avoid, and she felt the familiar thrum and crackle of a biotic field. Shards of rock and ice skittered across the platform on every side, and Liara had only a moment to wonder where the debris had come from before she was being hauled back to her feet, a spray of automatic weapon fire sounding off some distance behind her. _“Get back to the mako!"_  Shepard barked. Liara struggled to collect herself, but she dared a look past the commander--whose silhouette still vibrated with biotic energy--to see what had attacked. The beast towered over them, a writhing column of muscle and armored plates amidst the fractured remains of the very ground it had just broken through frighteningly close to their position, showering shrapnel over the ruins. It twisted and reeled back, emitting a piercing shriek. _“Now! Go go go c’mon,”_ Shepard was ushering her back toward their vehicle, as Liara realized with a sinking feeling that her hands were empty.

“The disk!”

_“Forget it!_ ” As they cleared the edge of the platform a huge viscous mass slammed into the obelisk and splattered the rock behind it, which began to hiss and bubble on contact. Liara tumbled into the mako with Shepard close behind, and the commander threw the tank into reverse without closing the side hatch, then banked hard to pull them up alongside Garrus. He clambered in, taking over Liara’s position in the back. Liara was just able to glimpse the creature curling back on itself and disappearing into the ground as Shepard slammed the hatch shut. “Fffucking-” She reached up to the back of her helmet, fumbling for a moment before the airtight seal broke with a soft hiss and she yanked it off, shoving it absent-mindedly into Liara’s hands beside her. _“Thresher maws?!_ ” she spat, sounding more indignant than anything else.

“Well we know what killed the geth,” Garrus pointed out.

Shepard laughed humorlessly. “I hate this system already. Now where-” she had barely begun her question before the ground exploded to their left and the thresher maw surfaced once again. Shepard let out another string of curses and urged the mako away just as the creature brought its claws down into the ground with enough force to send up another shower of snow and rock, which pinged off the back of the mako as they sped out into the clearing. “Hey, you ever fire anything bigger than that pistol of yours?”

It took a second for Liara to realize Shepard was talking to her. “N-no, I was never-”

“Well now’s your chance, make it count.” Shepard swung the mako’s nose back around to face the thresher as it disappeared beneath the surface once again, then used that moment of silence to flick another series of switches on the console. A smaller display flashed to life in front of Liara as a panel slid back to present her with what looked like a secondary steering grip. Liara balanced the commander’s helmet in her lap and reached out to rotate the grip experimentally, and the display turned with it, independent of the mako’s main body. “Machine gun,” Shepard said, leaning over and pointing to indicate a trigger on the left side of the grip, “eight second bursts or it overheats,” then, gesturing to the right side, “accelerator canon, f-” the thresher maw burst upward again, overturning the abandoned vehicle. It swung its head around toward the mako with another powerful screech. “Fivesecondrecharge aimforthehead,” Shepard finished quickly, reversing as the thresher sent another glob of acid flying in their direction. She pulled the mako around in a wide circle as the monster tracked their movement, and as soon as Liara felt she had even minor control over the turret, she sent a burst from the canon right--she hoped--into the thresher’s mass. It connected in a shower of electric energy, searing off one of the creature’s clawed limbs, and Garrus gave a triumphant whoop behind her as the thresher roared in outrage. Liara tried to follow it up with a volley from the machine gun, but Shepard swerved to avoid another shot of acid and the barrage went wide, glancing off the side of the thresher’s body and disappearing into the ice behind it. As the mako gained some distance the thresher dove again, though by now they knew they would have only a moment’s reprieve.

“Think you can make that shot again?” Shepard asked, casting Liara a wide-eyed look. Liara was unsure whether she saw fear or excitement in the commander’s expression, or some amalgam of both.

“I can certainly try,” she replied breathlessly.

A rumble and a sudden crack along the ice heralded the thresher’s next attack, and as it burst forth Shepard said “ookay, hold tight!” and sent the mako careering directly toward it.

“Commander what-!” Garrus gasped, but Liara had no time to question the maneuver. Instinct overtook her and she seized the opportunity to take a clear shot, sending another cannon pulse and a round of bullets directly into the soft flesh at the center of the thresher maw’s head. This time her second attack landed cleanly in the wake of the first, and the thresher reeled as the mako veered around the side of it. It looked for a moment like they would be able to flank it for another shot, before it recovered just enough to twist and bring its remaining claw down into the side of the hull with crushing force. Liara yelped as the console in front of her sparked and shorted out, and the mako swerved wildly in spite of Shepard’s attempts to control it. They collided with one of the massive chunks of rock the thresher had scattered across the clearing and were met with the sound of wrenching metal and the sudden sharp crack of a tire bursting, then the interior filled with the repetitive sound of several alarms.

“Damn it. _Damn_ it!” Shepard hissed, snatching her helmet back out of Liara’s grasp and hurriedly repositioning it. “Stay here,” she commanded, throwing open the hatch once again. Once she was on the ground she pressed her back against the hull, drawing her shotgun and taking one deep breath. The biotic field she had used to shield Liara from the first assault sprang to life around her again, then seemed to coalesce in a shimmering mass about her forearms. In another heartbeat, and without so much as another word, she peeled away from the mako and disappeared. A shot rang out across the clearing, followed by another of the thresher maw’s howls.

Liara and Garrus exchanged a momentary look, and while both of their expressions were obscured by their helmets they seemed to arrive at an immediate agreement--they would not be staying there. Garrus adjusted his grip on his assault rifle as he fell into step behind the commander, while Liara, in a moment of unexpected daring, hoisted herself up onto the roof of the mako. A few paces off Shepard stood primed, dark energy arcing over her as the thresher maw hurtled downward, preparing to crush her beneath its mass. At the last moment Shepard punched upward, sending a wave of energy cascading over the creature, pulling and tearing at its flesh. The thresher pitched backward, and as Garrus came into range a moment later he fired several bursts into its throat to further disorient it. The thresher tensed, preparing to bury them under another glob of acid, but in the same moment Liara threw her arms out, reaching out with her mind to cast a biotic net around the largest chunk of broken earth she could see. With a burst of energy she hurled it into the thresher maw, sending its attack harmlessly wide as the beast itself went crashing down. It writhed but did not immediately right itself, and Shepard crossed the remaining distance to fire several rounds into its flesh in quick succession, from the closest range she dared.

For several long seconds silence settled across the clearing, as all three of them waited with bated breath for the thresher to make another move. But it remained, contorted and unmoving where it had fallen, and all at once the spell was broken. Garrus and Shepard stowed their weapons, and Liara dropped herself carefully to the ground as they turned back toward the mako.

_“Are you okay?_ ” the commander asked suddenly, a peculiar urgency in her tone as she headed straight for Liara’s side. Shepard reached out as if to take hold of her, then hesitated and pulled back just as quickly, hovering a few paces away. It was impossible for Liara to guess what she was thinking behind the tinted visor of her helmet.

“I am fine, commander,” she replied. In truth, as the excitement of the battle began to ease she felt winded, and she leaned back against the side of the mako as her legs wobbled under her.

_“I'm good too Shepard, thanks for checking,_ ” Garrus interjected as he joined them.

Shepard waved him off, saying, _“I'm sure you fought plenty of threshers on the Citadel to prepare you for this."_ She stepped around him, looking the mako over and arriving at the flattened tire, which she kicked with her boot and sighed. _“I’ll run some omnigel through the frame to make sure nothing catches fire,”_ she mused, circling around to the open hatch on the opposite side, _“but I don’t think we’re gonna get this thing moving again without some help.”_

_“It’s almost like it wasn’t designed to be driven into a five-story tall monster.”_

_“Thanks Vakarian,”_ Shepard grumbled, leaning in to run the mako’s repair sequence without actually getting back into the vehicle. _“Really value your input.”_

When the fresh silence between them began to get uncomfortable, Liara cleared her throat, pushing herself up away from the mako. “Commander, I… I did not realize you were a biotic.”

“ _Yeah?_ ” Shepard chuckled. _“Well, the wonders never cease, right?_ ”

Liara tensed, scowling. This time she didn’t need to see the commander’s expression, she could hear every ounce of that self-satisfied smirk, and it set her teeth on edge. “Actually,” she blurted, before she could have a chance to reconsider, “I was thinking that your form probably compromises some of your power output.”

Garrus gave a short bark of laughter beside her, but Shepard did not immediately respond, and Liara’s momentary courage immediately drained away as she felt a knot of anxiety in her gut. _“Hey,_ ” Shepard said at last, stepping up onto the mako’s running board and folding her arms across the roof so she could see Liara over the top of it. _"I saved your life back there and you’re gonna criticize my style?”_

“Well I- I simply meant- I suppose asari biotics have a certain finesse that other races- wait no, that-” Liara sputtered, but Shepard cut her off with a laugh that was frustratingly familiar.

_“Well well well,”_ she said, _“so T’Soni’s got teeth after all._ ” Liara blinked, stunned into silence. The commander sounded almost… impressed? _“Alright,_ ” she added, stepping back down and walking back around to rejoin them. _“I’d love to see some of this finesse of yours. Once we’ve saved the galaxy why don’t we take a trip out to Pinnacle and you can show me how it’s done.”_

“C-certainly,” Liara replied, not sounding the slightest bit certain.

_“Great,_ ” Shepard fired back, crossing her arms and leaning back against the mako. _“I can’t wait._ ”

_“Uhh, commander,”_ Garrus cut in then, looking from the group back to the heap of dead thresher maw behind them. _“You think we could get a lift out of here before we find out if our friend there had backup?”_

_**_

Liara watched the lines of text as they scrolled by on the monitor, though she doubted a single word of it was sticking in her mind. She had been mentally replaying the fight against the thresher maw--and particularly, the ensuing conversation--since they set foot back on the Normandy two days ago. She hadn’t spoken to Shepard again since, as the commander had been preoccupied with overseeing repairs to the mako, reconfiguring their plan to clear the geth out of the Armstrong Nebula, and eagerly recounting the encounter on Antibaar to anyone who asked. Liara was fine with that, certain that she wouldn’t ever be able to open her mouth again without making an even bigger fool of herself, so when there was a tentative knock from the entrance of her makeshift room and she turned to see Shepard standing in the open doorway, she panicked. “Oh- uh, commander,” she gasped, scrambling to her feet, “I am sorry, I did not hear- I wanted to… I apologize if I overstepped a boundary on Antibaar, I was not thinking clearly after-”

“Whoah, hey, no that’s not- that’s not why I’m here,” Shepard said, holding her hands up in a placating gesture. “Do you have a minute?” Liara nodded hesitantly, stopping herself from launching into another frantic apology. “I just wanted to check in, I uh. Hm.” Shepard broke off, chewing her lip as her gaze drifted searchingly past Liara and around the room. “It was probably… _unprofessional,_ ” she ventured, her attention lingering on the monitor before she finally met Liara’s eyes again. “To… stick you on the turret, with no training. In such a high stress situation. So, I…” she seemed reluctant to hold Liara’s gaze, and turned her eyes upward as she rubbed the back of her neck.

For a moment Liara was unsure how to respond. She was certainly no expert on body language, but she knew this sort of uncertain fidgeting was wildly out of character. “I… promise I am fine, commander,” she offered, “we did not have many options, but I…” she realized all at once what Shepard _wasn’t_ saying, and she couldn’t help the slightest mischievous smile. “I do appreciate the apology.”

Shepard opened her mouth, shut it again, and grimaced like she’d just been caught in the midst of something incredibly compromising. “Right… good. Great,” she mumbled.

“Also, despite what I said on the surface, I _am_ grateful to you for saving me. Again,” Liara added, chuckling softly. “I admit I am consistently impressed by how swiftly you act under pressure.”

“Well, you know, no guts no glory, right?” Shepard shrugged, regaining a degree of her usual confidence although she still seemed slightly uncomposed. “Besides, what was I going to do, let you get crushed by the Shai-Hulud?” When she caught Liara’s bewildered expression she laughed. “Human thing,” she explained. “ _Old_ book.”

“Of course.” Liara nodded, absently sinking back into her chair as the atmosphere in the room became more relaxed. “Is that… why you do it? For the glory?”

“Do what?” Shepard asked, taking the wordless invitation to take the seat beside her.

“Any of it. _All_ of it. We _are_ trying to do no less than save the galaxy, are we not?”

Shepard sighed, leaning her elbows on the table and rubbing her eyes. “Yeah… for the glory, huh? I guess so.”

Liara studied her for a moment before pressing the subject. “You do not sound certain.”

“Nah, I just… no one ever asked.” Shepard rested her chin in her hand, staring past Liara at some indistinct point. “I didn’t have much of a choice to begin with. Both your parents are Alliance, you grow up on Alliance ships, that’s just sort of the life you get. You either learn to love it or it eats you alive.”

“That seems like a rather grim way to look at it,” Liara remarked. “But I am not sure it really answers my question. There are plenty who have served alongside you without rising to the same level of notoriety that you have.”

Shepard snorted. “No kidding. Do you have _any_ idea how often people want to remind me about Torfan?” She rolled her eyes with a wry laugh. “Like I wasn’t _there_ for that. But apparently it was either the most admirable or the most condemning point of my career, depending on who you ask and what day of the goddamn week it is. You do enough of that and everyone’s either gonna love you, hate you, or fear you, there’s no getting around that. But at the end of the day at _least…_ ” she hesitated, leaning back in her chair as she considered her point. “At least you can be sure they know your name.”

“And that is enough?”

“Well… they know your name, they know what you can do. What you _will_ do.” Shepard grinned. “Sometimes you don’t have to do _anything_.”

“And when this is all over,” Liara wondered, “if we stop Saren and survive… what do you suppose they will think of you then, Shepard?”

Shepard sank into a slouch, throwing one arm over the back of the chair as she pondered the question. “With my luck, they’ll thank me and then blame me for the damages.”

_.._


End file.
